Sisters, I have been actively crossdressing since I was 11. Yet, it has only been in the last few months I've done so with no psychic plaque and ego crushing guilt and shame. The last time I felt this free with dressing was when I was a tween.
Exactly one year ago I contemplated a gruesome Faulknerian suicide just so I wouldn't think about all this T-stuff. I couldn't deal.
So I went to therapy.
I hate to loose.
And friends, mister sisters, gals, and ladies...it took me a while to open up to my counselor. I went in every session thinking "this is it. I'm telling her today." And eventually I came out.
And it snowballed.
I was dressing the whole time, in fits and starts, hoping I could manage it myself. But I couldn't. The husband-father-friend guilt sucked me down into a hole.
Somtimes it wasn't so bad, but most of the time...
I can't explain the phenomenon of crossdressing any better than anyone else, but doing so without the ugh! of deceit and fear is frakking liberating.
My spouse is supportive to a point, and that's tre cool with this gal.
My kids, very young, call me Mommy, or Dadme, or Momde... For Halloween my oldest proclaimed I should be a witch. They can tell, I think, on some level.
Interesting note: in a recent study, psychologists noted that people who used fake avatars, pics, and identities on-line experienced confidence boosts. This age of gaming where boys can play as girls, and vice-versa, could be the foundation of the future culture where the barriers of gender are stripped further down to the bones.
George Mason, a fine southern middle of the road Academic institution elected a gay crossdresser for homecomming queen.